One of the most exciting things about getting married is standing in front of your friends and family, staring into your partners eyes, and declaring your love. It’s also one of the most daunting. Writing vows can be a nerve-racking experience if you don’t know where to start. Consider these tips, and remember that you can always edit after you put the words on the page.
We use clichés so often because they describe feelings we can all relate to. They’re often the first things that come to mind when we try to describe how we feel. But unfortunately they lack impact because they are overused. When you write the first draft of your vows, write down everything that comes to mind, clichés and all. Then, go back over your draft and replace those phrases with your own words.
Look at each phrase and ask yourself “what does this mean to me?” For example, instead of saying “you are my world”, you could say “you’re always on my mind. I am grateful for your influence on my life and your unwavering presence in it”. Instead of “I want to grow old with you”, try “I want to spend our lives together, to be as familiar to one another as we are to ourselves. I will be your source of comfort, safety, and stability, always by your side”.
Agree on a Framework
If you are planning on your vows being a surprise for your partner, make sure you are on the same page. A set word count will keep you both on track, and it’s a good idea to decide whether you want to be funny, serious, or a bit of both. If you want your vows to read like two halves of a whole, choose a structure that you will both follow. For example, talk about one thing from the past, the present, and the future, or start with praise and end with promises. Having a guide can even make it easier to get started writing your vows!
Be True to Yourself and Your Partner
Saying your vows is arguably the most important part of your wedding day. It’s your chance to express your feelings to your partner, and to share your love with your friends and family. It’s important to be yourself. Talk how you usually talk, and use words that you really mean. One way to make your vows personal and meaningful is to include specific details from your life together.
Describe what your partner does to make you feel loved. Is it their words, their actions, or something else? Reflect on the day you realised that you loved them, or your favourite memory together. Show your partner you really know them by describing values you both share, or qualities they have which you admire. Put yourself in their shoes and consider what they would most like to hear you say. This will ensure that your vows communicate the depth of your affection and make the person you love feel truly appreciated and giddy with happiness.
Don't forget to purchase these gorgeous wedding vow booklets to keep you words safe and to add a decorative touch to your wedding ceremony.